I don't have time for a real post in the immediate future, so I am giving you some Fantasy Football advice. Go back in time and draft this guy as your starting quarterback in the 6th round:
|Andrew Luck: Starting QB, Third-string Ladies' Man|
Then maybe your team will be 4-0 like mine is. Bonus points if you are drafting on your phone during class and pick up high-scoring wide receivers in the 2nd and 3rd rounds as a panic move because all the top running backs are taken, then play it off like you planned it that way when the top running backs get arrested/get injured/are ineffective.
I reserve the right to retract all of this when my team crashes and burns during a pivotal playoff match-up in about ten weeks' time.